7 Tools To Help Fight Sexual Sin (For Men)
1) Pray for grace: Overcoming sexual sin is not a battle you can fight alone. We all need God’s grace. Pray for the grace to be strong, to turn away from sin and to repent. Something simple as 3 Hail Marys in the morning to be free from mortal sin or St. Michael’s Prayer is very effective.
2) Get Outside: Pornography has a way of immobilizing us. Notice that when we’re lured into pornography most of our body starts to shutdown. Porn tends not to be consumed when one is up and about. Go outside! Take a walk. Play a sport. You may not want to visit a place that lures you in (the mall or the beach or wherever your weak spot is), but move. In a scene from Finding Nemo, a great amount of fish are caught in a net. To release themselves, they moved away from the trap with all their might. Move!
3) Think of women you love: Call to mind any woman who has brought you innocent joy. Your mom, grandma, daughter, sister, friend, cousin, classmate, etc How happy they make you! You would never let men have their way with them would you? They’re not commodities. Porn makes commodities of women. Just as we have protective instincts for the women we love, we must be courageous to defend the women we don’t know. Pray for courage. I’ve noticed that my relationship with Mary has helped the way I view and treat women. Ask Mama to be with you.
4) Avoid the ex-lover: When an ex-lover wants to get back with you, she calls to mind the fun times you had together. She avoids mention of the reasons why you’re apart. Sexual sin works like an ex-lover. You might be away from pornography and masturbation for a while and suddenly you find her seducing by calling to mind the high times. Avoid her. She’s a user. She’s bad news. As soon as she is done with you, she kicks you to the curb.
5) Don’t toss more coal into the furnace: When we’re lured into pornography, we’re immobilized. Our body turns into a bulky furnace. Don’t feed the furnace. Everyone has their own coal and it may not be porn related. For me, coal is feeding my body unhealthy treats. It lulls my body’s security team to sleep and leaves the door open to impurity. Whatever your coal: food, other forms of entertainment, music, TV, lazing around, etc Don’t feed the furnace.
6) Shut the first door: Many times, I found myself fighting against sexual sin when I could have easily avoided it by shutting the first door. Impurity tries to enter by offering suggestions that aren’t exactly sinful, but surely lead there. For example, you may start by watching music videos and notice some scantily clad women. No big deal, right? After all it isn’t porn. Wrong. By leaving this door open, impurity gets a free pass and is in better position than ever to wear you down. Shut the first door and if anyone comes knockin’, ask Jesus to get that for you.
7) Keeping seeking grace: I was at my umpteenth confession wondering whether I was getting better or worse. I felt like I was trapped in a whirlwind of sexual sin, but my Confessor could recognize my improvement and the effect of God’s saving grace. Sexual sin is a deep pit. The slope is the way in and the stairs are the way out. Confession is your get out of jail free card. “The Lord never tires of forgiving, it is we who tire of asking for forgiveness” (Pope Francis). You might be frequenting the Sacrament of Reconciliation not knowing whether or not you’re improving. Trust in God’s Mercy, it has the power to save you.
If this list helped you out, please share it with a brother who is struggling.
Let’s pray for each other:
Jesus, Lover of chastity, Mary, Mother most pure, and Joseph, chaste guardian of the Virgin, to you I come at this hour, begging you to plead with God for me. I earnestly wish to be pure in thought, word and deed in imitation of your own holy purity.
Obtain for me, then, a deep sense of modesty which will be reflected in my external conduct. Protect my eyes, the windows of my soul, from anything that might dim the luster of a heart that must mirror only Christlike purity.
Heart of Jesus, Fount of all purity, have mercy on us (http://www.catholic.org/prayers/prayer.php?p=498).